Stonewall Anniversary: Pride of the Black Queer American

Illustration by Margarita Babina

June is Pride Month: an affirmative time of increased visibility of LGBTQ people during which happiness through self-expression is promoted. June 28th is the date commemorating the Stonewall riots, one of the most important events leading to the gay liberation movement and a modern American society inclusive of LGBTQ humans.

We remember Stonewall as a series of spontaneous, violent retaliations (i.e. riots) in response to predatory policing. While police raids on gay bars were routine in the 1960s, on June 28th, 1969 in response to persistent police raids, people of Greenwich Village Manhattan decided to fight back. When cops became violent, village residents formed activist groups to concentrate efforts on carving out safe places for the LGBTQ community to exist without fear of being beaten or arrested. The scene in this Manhattan community erupted into more protests the next evening, and again several nights later. These events became remembered as the Stonewall Rebellion and the start of a modern contest for LGBTQ rights in the United States.

Today, fighting for your identity as a trans person remains a struggle. The harsh reality is to have pride means facing a constant war. Since the start of this year we have seen at least 16 transgender people fatally shot as well as killed by other violent means. Our revolutionary ancestors were literally fighting for liberation of the LGBTQ community to have respect and the same included rights of other citizens. A growing list of names including: Alexa Luciano Ruiz,  Serena Angelique Velázquez, Layla Pelaez, Tony Mcdade, Dustin Parker, Yampi Mendez Arocho, Monika Diamond, Lexii Johanna Metzger, Layla Pelaez Sanzhez, Penelope Diaz Ramirez, Nina Pop, Helle O’Regan, Domonique Fells, Riah Milton, and Jayne Thompson indicates not enough is changing. At any moment, I am dead on the ground, another name to the list.

From birth to now living confidently in my womanhood, my journey contained joyous moments as well as dark and scary occasions. It took so long to connect my inner feminine my outer world. It took longer to correct people when they misgender me. Longer still for me to walk in public wearing a dress I love so much. I had just finished my daily run the morning of June 12th,  when the news broke that Trump’s administration finalized a regulation removing nondiscrimination protection for transgender people, this coming on the heels of several other reversals of protections for our group. I read the headline in distress, terrified, and instantly feeling small considering how this action- a few strokes from a pen held by a reality star- will affect me and every single last living transgender American.

Unfortunately, my days since the devastating passing of George Floyd and Breonna Taylor that became the spark of a worldwide protest for black lives, have been a cycle of: checking my phone to see another one of my people dying, not eating on a normal schedule, then prioritizing advocacy over self care and creativity. Moments I am living and reliving again as the black woman I’ve struggled to become.  

I do not feel safe. Not as a black transgender woman in this country. Not as a human being, and my body has gone cold. 

That is my reality yet I do not take my life for granted. I show up every day. It doesn't matter how I feel: I arrive at the occasion because there is no pause button on this journey. 

For me, pride today means seeking safe spaces like a refuge to be creative. I long for more than a temporary laugh, peace beyond what I can see from my window, and a new song that isn't about getting shot by the police.

My celebration this month, will be what I did today to save my life, what I said to encourage someone, and what I was able to teach from what I learned. And within this prerogative, let history not repeat itself: let it be made.

-Sunny Grant