Joseph Giampino
Illustration by Kiara Sanders
I saw the sign and it opened up my eyes, I saw the sign, painted by Joseph Giampino!
Do you believe in signs from “the heavens”?
Hmmmmm….. I believe you sometimes get a feeling and we should pay more attention to those when they happen. Sometimes it’s a bad feeling, like a chill that runs through your body that’s trying to tell you something. Don’t trust this person. Be aware. Pay attention. There IS something else out there and we don’t know what the hell it is. So the answer is yes!
What has been your strangest dream about work?
I’ve had a recurring work dream since I was a child, before I even knew what work was. It’s this overwhelming feeling of being too busy, biting off more than I can chew. I get super excited when it’s going smoothly and fast. But then suddenly I realize that I’m just treading water. I think this is my daily routine now.
If you could only listen to one song for the rest of your life, what would it be?
So…. I can’t pick one, but I can tell you the song that will be played at my funeral, and the scenario. Someone is going to dress up like John Cusack in Say Anything and hold a boombox over their head while Goodbye Horses by Q Lazzarus is playing. I’ll be laid out on a raft-a shitty beach raft from Wings that’s completely filled with fireworks. Someone is going to blow a fireball from a shot of booze and a Bic lighter. Then they push me off into a lake. The End. My favorite song though is Push by The Cure. Favorite album: Dummy by Portishead.
If you were a billionaire how would you indulge yourself?
Billionaire. I would first make sure all my friends were taken care of financially. Then I would take my family and disappear. I would send a postcard once a year with nothing written on it to remind people I’m still alive. A little Shawshank style.
What’s the hardest lesson you’ve ever learned?
Patience. I’m still learning this one. It’s literally the my worst enemy. But something I’ve learned is to not give up. Go big or go home.
If you could describe yourself in one word, what would it be?
Knucklehead
What do you believe to be the main issue affecting humanity today?
People’s ability to communicate correctly. Shaking someone’s hand, looking someone in the eyes, being confident, being trustworthy, or just being real. I think a lot of this is due to how people just stare at screens all day. The lack of human interaction today is ridiculous. Shit, have you driven on the highway lately?
What’s your motto?
I have a few….
Head down, brush up.
Never trust a fart.
Never trust someone who doesn’t like dogs.
Anyone who eats a Filet-O-Fish is a serial killer.
Hustle like Pete Rose.
Best breakfast food?
Taylor Ham, egg and cheese on a hard roll, salt, pepper, ketchup.
Fave story about love?
Besides marrying my beautiful wife at The Rialto Theatre….
I once worked at McDonalds in high school. I had a huge crush on this girl named Molly. She so happened to pop in one day with her dad and sister. They ordered like a Happy Meal and a Big Mac. I filled up two bags full of food: like 5 apple pies, four large fries, 3 Big Macs, 5 cheeseburgers, etc. Her dad looked at me and was like, “this is the wrong order, I didn’t order all this.” I replied “yes, you did.” Haha! I could only imagine that ride home.
